By Friday morning last week, I think I had seen 52 (no joke) tweets, Instastories, emails and blog mentions from everyone and their mom having had THAT KINDA WEEK.
This. week. has. been. long.
I’m so exhausted it’s ridiculous.
Why do I feel like 95% of my interactions this week have been really weird
Today was a LONG one…
This week has actually been a year.
Also on Friday, I had approximately 7 meltdowns by 2 pm. One of which included crying hysterically that “my Lexus” was going to be “taken away from me” that day. (ICYMI, I was test driving a Lexus NX for a hot sec – and it was amazing, and now Santa’s gotta get his act together for Christmas 2018 😉 ). So yeah, doin’ real well.
It was the hot mess express over at CUR headquarters, and I was really not feelin’ too swell. But in our lowest moments, that’s when we’re given the grace + strength to grow high again.
Later on, I had a call with one of my cohorts behind the scenes at CUR, who has turned into a girlfriend of mine – and we were talking about a few challenges we were facing on the social media scene. I had gone into the call so insanely frustrated about a whole BUNCHA things. But we hung up and I felt ~better~. Not fixed by any means, but better.
And better is, welp, BETTER.
And it got me thinking about a Q that one of you (actually, a few of you) brought up in the CUR reader survey AND in a few #AskE submissions, on overcoming obstacles + “battles” in life. And I thought it was the LAST thing I should be writing about at that moment, since I was not at all feelin’ like an overcomer or conquerer of any obstacle that day.
…Which is exactly why it needed to be conquered intentionally. Right now. 😉
“I will carry on.”
A simple statement with bold impact when dedicatedly said.
I. Will. Carry. On.
Today’s Monday Mantra is more than a mantra – it’s a declaration. Because in our lowest lows, the LAST thing we feel like doing is declaring victory over something. Because we don’t feel strong – we feel weak, sad, exhausted, the works. We don’t feel victorious or brave or capable. We might feel blatantly defeated.
Which is exactly when + why we need to make a bold decision with bold impact to reverse the onslaught of negativity that is currently catapulting us into a downward spiral of bad feels.
I am the QUEEN of spiraling.
Seriously, tho. Queen Spiral, at your service. Whenever I’m in a rut – just ask my mama – I have this not-so-good tendency to go right to worst case scenario in my head. And soon, the Scale 3 Situation is now going right past 10 and into SOS Emergency territory, for no good reason other than I allowed my brain to take it there. It’s like when I was in college – scoring poorly on one test would turn into me thinking I was going to fail the class, fail the year, fail school pointblankperiod, and lose all career aspirations, settling to working a drive-thru window for the rest of forever. All because I did not-so-hot on one test.
Can ya relate?
It’s all in the mind, really.
It’s all in the mind.
When we’re facing any sorta obstacle or battle in life, how it affects us AND how we respond (versus react) are entirely dependent on how we THINK about the situation at hand. Because how that exact same obstacle would affect Nancy Next Door would depend on how she would think about it, etc.
How we think is such a unique experience, typically so deeply rooted in a thousand different past experiences, thoughts, and teachings. So how we approach challenges and how we mentally scale mountains before beginning the actual climb depends entirely on what’s going on in our pretty little brains leading up to the point of action. The fears, worries, + anxieties that might try and work their way into your heart are different than those for our good friend Nancy Next Door, because you’re two entirely different people with entirely different everything. I know I’m guilty of sometimes trying to make myself feel better about a situation by looking at the neighbor’s grass, so to speak, to see whose is greener (can ya relate again?). We let our attitudes about a roadblock or obstacle be affected by how we think so-and-so is handling it, or how we “should” be reacting since so-and-so said XYZ. But that doesn’t truly serve us – it might serve our ego temporarily, but it doesn’t truly serve us in our growth towards our best selves.
I will carry on.
A phrase entirely dependent on YOUR attitude towards YOUR obstacles.
Not Nancy Next Door’s – but yours.
I’ve seen what feels like way too many chicas fall unfortunately victim to a victim mindset lately. Feeling like everyone and their mom is out to get them, they’re doing everything right and just not getting their way, etc. Feeling defeated because of the outside, while not elevating or adjusting on the inside.
And while it’s oh so easy sometimes to think that we have no control, and to just fall victim to the circumstances around us, it’s oh so important to recognize that both of those ideas are false and unhelpful.
Sure, we’re not always (or ever) in control – of what happens to us or around us. But we ARE in control of how we think. Because for any + every thought that comes through our head, we have the power to say yes or no – to allow it to hang out and be pondered, or to say NOPE SIR and move on to the next mental topic.
When I was “having a sh*t day” last week, I realized that I spent a casual four hours being completely unproductive, doing absolutely nothing. I’m sorry…what? Yup. By the time I was over the wallowing, I thought to myself, “Self, what did you do today? What did you DO to actively address the sh*t?”
And I had no good answer for myself.
Because the truth was, I had done NOTHING. I had not carried on.
I had let myself stop and wallow in stagnancy. When my attitude was not action-oriented, it was just blah – and no good action could possibly come from it. My attitude had been depressed, half EXPECTING the next bad thing to happen on an assuredly bad day. So…what the heck could be expected to happen expect more bad things??? I sure as heck wasn’t doing anything to bring about GOOD, so how could I expect a change?
It’s all in the mind – a simple mindset shift with the power to change our next step.
I will carry on.
What changed the course of my girlfriend’s and my phonecall was a simple attitude adjustment. We went in feeling discouraged + disgruntled, like social media is out to get us. Algorithms won’t let us win. Yadda yadda yadda, gimme a break.
Midway through the conversation, our tone + goal became one of conquering.
Sure, we might not know what the HELL any one algorithm or the next is doing from one week to the next (or heck, from Tuesday to Wednesday). But we can do SOMETHING with what we DO know. We can either wallow in self-pity and throw the woe-is-me party (which is really unfun for, well, everyone). Or we can decide we’ll friggin’ CARRY. ON.
I won’t dare say “keep calm” and carry on, cos Lord only knows keeping calm has never been this girl’s strongest suit. 😉
But we have the power to at least carry on with a next step. That next step can help us or hurt us – it depends entirely on the attitude with which we’re steppin’.
How can (and will) you carry on this week when facing an obstacle or battle?
I will carry on. And so can you.
Cheers to Monday, girlfriend!
P.S. Want more Monday Mantra inspo? The whole series shebang is right here!