This post may contain affiliate links; see site footer for more details.
Dress (Only $40!!!! Also comes in black + navy. It’s just a beautiful chiffon fabric – a fabulous choice if you want/need a gorgeous dress without breaking the bank! Runs TTS – I’m in a Small) // Heels (Comes in a TON of colors – Also available here! I just bought these recently and they’re already FAVORITES! These are Sam Edelman – I also have Steve Madden Carrson heels (another popular heel of a similar style), but the heel height on these is sliiiiiiightly less and thereby easier to walk in + more comfortable, bless up) // Necklace // Earrings // Bracelet // Bracelet (c/o) // Ring
Around these rosy parts, it’s a phrase we know well. When it comes time to treat yo’self to an ice cream sandwich before dinner (or heck, for breakfast), I’m first in line. Or when Kate Spade has a sale…sign me up. I’m the absolute *best* (or worst? 😉 ) girlfriend to take shopping, because I can convince you in 5 seconds flat why you should absolutely buy that $200 pair of jeans that make your butt look amazing. In some ways, treat yo’self is truly my life motto. But in other ways…it’s a major work in progress.
As a total workaholic, it can be oh so hard for me to truly embrace the “treat yo’self” mentality. Really, it’s far too often that I feel straight up guilty treating myself to anything, unless XYZ happens first. I tell myself if I didn’t earn it, I can’t have it.
And that’s the kicker.
While it’s great to incentivize ourselves to achieve our goals + make it happen, it can become dangerous territory to *only* treat ourselves IF.
- IF we reach our goal
- IF we make the grade
- IF we get the promotion
Especially with things we can’t even 100% control – we simply cannot tie our self love to third party circumstance. I 100% stand behind setting huge goals with huge rewards for when we make it happen – hello, hit the goal get the gucci. But when our mindset shifts to I cannot have nice things UNLESS I do something to “deserve” nice things, that’s when we have a problem.
You deserve nice things justbecause you are you.
You deserve to feel good about yourself justbecause we all do.
You deserve to feel beautiful and cherished and love justbecause you are.
For me, this was the BIGGEST mindset block for years. I’ve talked about it before, but we grew up with modest means. Especially when I started having such amazing opportunities because of CUR, I would feel downright GUILTY if it at all involved me having something nicer than what my parents ever had growing up. Or, I’d just feel like a flat-out fraud. Who was I to have a beautiful diamond ring custom made for me? Or to experience the gorgeous Riviera Maya? Or to ride a horse through the Arizonan desert, or in a hot air balloon? I’m just a normal girl #werking to make it happen – I need to save a village or stop world hunger or something before ever justifying spending a prettier penny on anything for myself.
Even to this day.
You guys know I just recently bought my first designer bag, but *only* because I hit a huge goal I had set for myself. Y’all…I hit that goal at the beginning of November. It still took me 3+ months to pull the trigger, because a part of me STILL felt guilty about it! It’s something I struggle with regularly – this battle between tying “treat yo’self” moments to some sort of achievement, versus tying it to lovelovelove of me just for me.
At the end of the day, we have to be willing to invest in ourselves justbecause we know in our hearts that we’re worth it.
In business, they always say “it takes money to make money.” Invest in yourself slash your business in order to grow and make money down the road.
In love, the same sorta idea stands – it takes more love to grow. In a relationship, obviously love is important – the more you selflessly love on your partner, the stronger you become as a couple and the more your love grows in time. As an individual (single OR taken – we’re all still individuals!), the same goes. The more you love yourself + treat yourself with TLC, the more you allow yourself to blossom into the person you were born to become – into your best self.
Comin’ atcha with two truth bombs:
1.) Loving yourself is just as important (if not moreso) as being loved by someone else.
2.) Loving yourself is essential, first + foremost, before being ABLE to be truly loved by someone else.
So often, V-Day gets a bad rap as being a cheesy, commercialized holiday for lovers. Good for you if you’ve got your mate – otherwise, no bueno, have fun on your couch with Ben & Jerry.
But I think we should change that.
Love is being A-OK with the woman God made you to be, regardless of what any significant other (current, potential, OR ex), boss, or other random passerby thinks of you.
Love is knowing that no matter who comes into your life or when, you’ve got your own back.
Love is feeling confident in the person that you are, and the best self that you’re constantly becoming.
Love is a willingness to always grow + blossom – to always push yourself to work hard, but to also allow yourself to slow down when need be.
Love is wanting to be your own best friend ’cause HOT DAMN you funny. 😉
Love is personal.
Who says you need a reason to treat yo’self to something nice? And moreso, who says you need a MAN to do it for you?
This Valentine’s Day, I’m so excited to be partnering with my friends at LAGOS to show off some of their absolutely GORGEOUS, totally giftable pieces to make that special someone (*cough* yourself *cough*) sparkle. Their new Beloved designs are dainty + personal, and can be even more personal with a heartfelt “tattoo” engraving to make it meaningful.
I first fell in lovelovelove with LAGOS after being introduced to their Caviar collection. I mean…gorgeous. It’s such a classic yet modern-looking line, and it’s just about impossible to not find something you’re all heart-eyed after on first glance. Then, I acquired a few pearl pieces – specifically, this dainty pearl necklace, these matching studs, and this gorgeous pearl bracelet. Pearls are always an answer, so…yes. And now, their new Beloved pieces have a whole new place in my heart this Valentine’s Day. I got the Beloved Bolo bracelet engraved with “E ♥ J”. At first, I was hesitant to engrave anything lovey-dovey since the whole point here is about self love. But then I realized…love is a choice. You can be a strong, independent individual and still be selfless in a relationship. You can wake up every day and CHOOSE to love someone else, the same way that you wake up every day and CHOOSE to love yourself. Love is a choice, in that it won’t all be coming up roses all of the time (get it? 😉 ). In a relationship, some days are just friggin’ hard. When you’re single, some days are just friggin’ hard. No matter your relationship status, there are hard days + hard things in life. It’s up to US to choose to get past the hard stuff to get to the good stuff – and it’s up to us to choose to USE the hard stuff to better appreciate the good stuff, too.
What I also lovelovelove about LAGOS – their pieces run the price gamut. Sure, you can splurge on an absolutely breathtaking piece for $5,000+ (be careful not to drool on your keyboard…;) ) – you can also treat yo’self to a totally gorgeous necklace, bracelet, or pair of earrings for under $200. Everything is designed with intention by founder Steven Lagos, in a process fueled by organic inspiration and a lovelovelove of adding more sophistication + beauty to the world to complement her own confident journey.
All that to say…love is personal. Love is a choice. Choose to treat yo’self, this Valentine’s Day and beyond.
How will you treat yo’self this Valentine’s Day? And how do you #MyLagosMy Way?
I’d lovelovelove to hear about your own journeys of self love + beyond in a comment down below!
*Thanks to LAGOS for sponsoring this post. As always, all opinions + thoughts presented are entirely my own. Thank YOU for supporting the brands that support Coming Up Roses!