Ah, CYBER MONDAY. We’ve been there, we’ve done that. You’ve scoured the sales, you’ve explored the cyberspace. And 23957 clicks later, you’ve got 4 online carts full to the brim, cold coffee in your mug, and not enough mental energy left to brave the next “surprise flash sale” that’ll leave you questioning your parenting skills as you seriously consider tapping into the ol’ college fund to make it through . I mean, the whole thing is just exhausting.
I blame whoever the heck thought this was a good idea. Just keep the sale happenin’ ALL YEAR ROUND AMIRIGHT?!
Anyhoo.
Because this was a hit, let’s do it again. 50 thoughts you have while shopping online. Starting with…
- CYBER MONDAY, LESSSSSGO. Who’s ready? I’m ready.
- What am I doing here? I should not be here.
- I cleaned the house yesterday so I can buy today.
- Actually I only got to cleaning my desk, but that’s a start amiright?
- Speaking of desks, I think mine needs . [30% off with code MORECHEER]
- OMG , free shipping, AND 50% off all sweaters?!
- OK, onto Gucci.
- First thing’s first: sort by price, low to high.
- WHY IS THE LOWEST PRICE $780?!? What’s the highest price? My kidney?
- JK Gucci ain’t on sale. #ThankUNext
- Oh, but these casual are. I KID YOU NOT.
- What’s today? Oh, everything? SWEET.
- And AND free shipping?!?! I was just thinking that I need ALL THE THINGS FROM THERE.
- I’ll just ramen for a week.
- …or three.
- Note to self: Vaccuum today.
- Second note to self: Do I need a new vaccuum?
- Almost done…that should be…
- $2,619.50??!
- OK, I’ll give up .
- Who am I kidding? There are wants and there are needs, and I obviously need. [code: CYBER35]
- Help me, I’m poor.
- Too soon for wine?
- …and free shipping…and 60% off right now…
- Take my computer away, for all of our good.
- I need wine.
- And you need . [$10.36 + free shipping]
- AND 50% off everything else?! [code: CYBER]
- *needs $30 more in cart for free shipping*
- *adds $130 more worth of sh*t I don’t need to be safe*
- Speaking of sh*t I don’t need (but am 100% buying, because $12 and #priorities)…
- What size top am I now? Small? Medium?
- I worked out this week, so definitely a small.
- But I also ate an ice cream sandwich for breakfast today…
- . THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
- Did I pay off my credit card yet?
- No? Huh. So a few more bucks on that balance won’t hurt, amiright?
- Balance. Like yoga.
- Speaking of yoga, sounds about right.
- I have in 4 colors in long sleeve and 5 colors , so what is the probability that I need it again?
- LOL, I hate math.
- Except when math is 50% off EVERYTHING at Old Navy.
- P.S. There’s a 100% chance that .
- There’s a 30% chance that it’s already raining. I need a new bra.
- Welp, they’re .
- Now I need something pink, too. Is it Wednesday yet?
- Sh*t no, it’s Monday. Duh, E.
- This is hard. Shopping is hard.
- Lord, I need a vacation.
- ?
What do you think while shopping online? And what’s on your Cyber Monday sales shopping list?
If you’ve felt the feels, commiserate in the comments below. 😉 And share these thoughts you have while shopping online with your best shopping buddy while you’re at it. We’re in this together.